I help people move into deeper levels of self-acceptance every day, but one misguided belief still surprises me every time I hear it: healing is a gentle process.

Where on earth did that lie come from??

Definitely not the meditators who’ve sat through sobbing in shame.
Definitely not the yogis who’ve breathed through shaking with rage.
Definitely not the body workers who’ve held steady through screaming pain.

Healing sucks.

It hurts. It takes work, and it’s hard.

Deciding to transform your crappy habits and patterns into a freer, lighter way of being means signing up for an all-out war. Because those old beliefs don’t give up easily. They’re invested in who and how you are.

Your thoughts and emotions may drive you bonkers, but they like being in control. And if you start to threaten their supremacy, you’re going to pay for it by having to face every ugly truth about yourself you never wanted to see.

And it’s going to hurt.

But, let’s be honest – you’re already in pain. You’re unhappy, dissatisfied, and disillusioned.

So what’s a little more?

I know, I know, you just want to get to the blissful end state – the calm, the serenity, the feeling of peaceful presence.

But that’s like the corner office of life. It’s reserved for the select few who are willing to do what others won’t in order to literally rise above what the rest would rather numb out and fall below.

The people who get up at 5am to make time to create.
The people who meditate every single day even when they’re over it.
The people who stand up to their resistance and see through it to their dream on the other side.

That’s why my business isn’t called “the free and the easy” or “the free and the I-just-coasted-here”. It’s called the free and the brave.

Because this path takes courage.

Facing yourself and carrying on takes guts and strength. It takes unwavering belief and determination that there is a sunny day on the other side of this self-imposed shit storm.

So be gentle on yourself for how hard you’re working. Be kind and forgiving of your missteps and short-comings. But don’t expect the process to be easy. Don’t expect rainbows and butterflies to replace self-hate and anxiety overnight.

Instead fortify yourself for the long-haul. Because you either want the end result or you don’t.

And if you do, then know you’re signing on for new pain. But it’s pain with a purpose. You’re fighting for your freedom.

Be free. Be brave. Be YOU!