Have you ever had a tricky door lock? You know the kind with a seemingly secret code – pull the handle towards you, then put the key in most of they way – but not all the way – then lift at just the right moment. Then viola! You can finally turn the lock.
Life is like that too.
There are usually 1 or 2 key steps that, if you did them, you would unlock the door to the next phase of your life.
It might be a huge step, like moving, quitting your job, starting a business, or filing for divorce. Or it could be something more subtle like going to the gym everyday, quitting eating sugar, or letting go of an old resentment.
But unlike your front door’s secret code, you most likely know what step would change your life – you’re just not taking it.
Why is that?
In my experience, it’s one of a few reasons:
1) Being where you are now is easy.
It’s comfortable and you know what’s involved and what to expect. If you play out your current path over a couple years, you might not like the outcome, but you can avoid thinking about that by being busy, watching TV, and stress eating now.
2) You’re not sure what’s on the other side of that door.
Your intuition has told you what actions would dramatically shift your life and open the door, but you’re left to imagine what comes after that. What if it leads to more growth? What if when you change, you have to make tough decisions like to ditch your complaining best friend or leave your unfulfilling job? That can be scary (see #1).
3) You don’t know which door will open.
You may have a lot of ideas on what big action would change your life – meditate daily, write a book, go all-in on exercise & healthy eating – but be unclear or afraid of which path each choice will lead you down. You know all of them will change you deeply, so you worry which ever one you choose might pull you into a rabbit hole. AKA you might lose part of what you think you want now.
4) Your vision isn’t compelling enough.
You may have hopes for where a dramatic life shift might lead, but you’re not convinced enough of the outcome to motivate your action today. This may be because you can’t imagine it, don’t know anyone who’s lived it, or don’t think it’s possible for someone like you (someone who’s not connected, famous, brilliant, beautiful, young, etc). Instead of using your energy to find out if your vision lives up to your expectations – you wish and dream about what might be instead. The infamous and endless delay cloaked as “I need more clarity”.
5) You’re not sure you can do it.
You question and doubt your capabilities, strength, and readiness. Particularly you’re readiness. Because you know that if you take this action and make a dramatic shift, you will be in new and different circumstances that require you to be a new and different person. Although your deeper wisdom knows you’ll grow into the opportunity, your logical mind says “I’m not ready for that”, so you busy yourself preparing by talking about, reading self-help books, taking more classes, etc. (This is sneakily #1).
So given all these real and compelling reasons to stay the same, how do you take action to dramatically shift your life?
You have to trust that your intuition hasn’t been telling you to go to the gym, wake up earlier, take the Realtor’s exam, or apply for a promotion just for the fun of it.
You have to decide that knowing that you TRIED – that you faced your fears and did it anyway – is enough to make the shift worthwhile.
Then you have to leap, prepare yourself for turbulence, and stay on course anyway.
Otherwise, you’re going to spend your whole life using the side door because you never learned the secret to unlocking the front door.
Be free. Be brave. Be YOU!
Want help navigating your fears and figuring out your next step? Schedule a no-obligation discovery consultation now!