There can be a certain sadness to following your dreams in the beginning. You might want things that take you away from loved ones or familiar settings.
You might have to leave behind old friends and ways of being that don’t reflect what you want for yourself in the future.
Choosing between two things you might equally love is tough, especially when they’re as big and vague as your vision and your present.
Newton’s first law of motion sums it up well: a body at rest will stay at rest unless acted upon by an outside force.
Most of us are happy to settle for the obvious choice – keep things as they are – unless we have a really good reason to change:
– We’re miserable
– We’re fired
– We’re transferred
– Someone gets sick
– We get divorced
You get the picture.
We tend to let catastrophic and seemingly uncontrollable events determine our lives.
But the way I see it, there are plenty of opportunities to make more empowered choices before you get to a state of crisis.
– You could exercise every day and eat better instead of waiting until you’re overweight and gravely ill to scare you into health.
– You could proactively look for opportunities to pursue a career that inspires and excites you, instead of allowing the job to define your potential.
But most of us don’t take hold of our innate power. Instead we allow ourselves to be tossed around by the waves and winds of life.
Why would anyone passively turn over the reigns to their life and happiness?
Easy – pressure, imagined or otherwise.
Society has all sorts of lovely names for people who single-mindedly pursue their dreams over settling for the norm:
Selfish, greedy, egomaniac, self-seeking, self-serving, self-absorbed, narcissistic, self-important, self-indulgent, cocky, vain, arrogant, pompous, out-of-touch, greedy, social-climber, gold-digger, or even “networker”.
No wonder it’s easier to stay at rest!
To go against the grain and claim your own dreams – you face an uphill battle before you’ve even let the idea leave your lips.
And that’s before the challenges and risk of never succeeding!
But here’s what I want to ask you – and what I ask all my clients – Do other opinions matter more than yours?
Because what you’re really doing when you decide to stay instead of moving or work that job instead of starting your dream career, is saying loud and clear that you’d rather give up your dreams than risk upsetting other people.
Is that true? Is that what’s real for you deep down?
If it is, cool. At least now you know where you stand and you can’t stop worrying, wishing, and complaining. Your work is to build up your confidence so that you feel worthy of having dreams at all.
But if it’s not, then I challenge you to consider what’s really stopping you. Confidence, fear, or the sadness implied in changing and leaving something behind – I invite you to get clear.
Then you’re just a courageous choice away from freedom.
Be free. Be brave. Be YOU!
- What to do when you start slipping on your goals - January 9, 2019
- “But it’s not safe to be me…” 3 approaches to the fear of not being safe - January 7, 2019
- 3 tangible gifts of living your truth - January 5, 2019